Okay, So I'm Not 20 Anymore...

Nor have I been for awhile. :sigh:

Regardless, this song really speaks to me.  I think the lyrics speak for themselves.  I often find myself singing it since the first time I heard it months ago.  Gotta love it...

Song: Free To Be Me
Album: My Paper Heart
Artist: Francesca Battistelli

At twenty years of age I'm still looking for a dream
A war's already waged for my destiny
But You've already won the battle
And You've got great plans for me
Though I can’t always see

(Chorus)
‘Cause I got a couple dents in my fender
Got a couple rips in my jeans
Try to fit the pieces together
But perfection is my enemy
On my own I'm so clumsy
But on Your shoulders I can see
I'm free to be me

When I was just a girl I thought I had it figured out
My life would turn out right, and I'd make it here somehow
But things don't always come that easy
And sometimes I would doubt

(Chorus)

And you’re free to be you

Sometimes I believe that I can do anything
Yet other times I think I've got nothing good to bring
But You look at my heart and You tell me
That I've got all You seek
And it’s easy to believe
Even though

(Chorus)

Thank You, Carrie Underwood...

For now I cry like a ninny at least once an hour... which is how often I hear this song now...




Not saying I don't love this song, because I most absolutely do. Just... WOW. Tearjerker!

These Are A Few Of My Favorite Things...

This song is just amazing. I can't hear it without crying. And written by a man who was an awesome minister who was taken to Heaven much too soon. Thank you, Jesus, for giving this man the talent and the song. It's a perfect explanation of what His love has done for me. And yet I wasn't even born when it was written...

Bobby & I once danced to this song in Ralph's (Grocery store) at 1am after a difficult week. I don't remember particularly why it was a hard week, but I do remember the spontaneity of the moment and the romance of the way Bobby took the bag of Dorito's I was picking out of the bin and threw it aside as we began our waltz over to the bottled water aisle. One of the most romantic moments of my entire life.

I love this song. It's just flat out soothing & peaceful. Just the other night I had a tough night. Okay, I admit. It was a bad hair day that took hours to repair. When this song came on my iPod I stopped, took a deep breath, felt the calm take over me, and was able to accomplish my goal. This song I have played on happy days, sad days, stressful days, and days full of rejoicing. :sigh:

I really can't explain this one. It's been my favorite song since I was a wee teenager. I do know that when I realized I didn't want to be alone forever as I had previously claimed during my divorce was while listening to this song. I wanted to feel "Hysteria". Yeah, I know. Super cheesy. Who cares, go read another blog if you don't want cheese, because me? I'm all about cheese. Especially since Bobby came along. Thanks to him, I know "Hysteria".

LOVE this! Who doesn't?

Okay, just kidding. I was serious about the others though!

More to come as I think of them... I'm tapped out for now.

Mmm Mmm Good...

First of all.... What exactly do you do when you suddenly have a craving for Taco Bell, but yet the meat for lasagna is thawing?  Such tough decisions!  Whatever will I DO?!

Second:

Do you feel as though half of your arteries clogged up just by looking at this photo?




Really?




Probably because THEY DID!


See, the thing is, I'm having a really hard time here. Do I post my secret recipe for the world to see?  Do I share my hints, tips, & secrets?  Such a challenge!

It really is the best fried chicken ever, though. It even won the award for the best fried chicken ever. From who? Doesn't matter. But it's the best. Ever. Hands down. Period. I'm not just saying that because I'm biased either.

Maybe I'll make a decision as I layer my lasagna tonight and post it while it's baking... or not...

Clean

There's just something about a good rainfall that makes everything seem whole and pure.  Kind of like the feeling after a good cry that was long coming.  A release to allow all that has been penned up to let loose and clear out.  The exhaustion that comes with it is both inevitable and welcome.  Some of the best slumber is that which takes place during a storm.  Laying with your eyes closed, listening to the thunder in the distance as the rain hits the window.  Whether napping on a couch, bed, floor, car seat, desk chair, or bench... it's destined to be calming.  If there's a chill in the air, even better.

I'm so thrilled for the rain we are enduring now and for the remainder of this week.  I only hope that everyone is safe that is out there driving in it.  It seems Californians never know how to handle this odd spectacle that is water falling from the sky and only happens about 3 times a year.

Here comes the rain again
Falling on my head like a memory
Falling on my head like a new
emotion
I want to walk in the open wind
I want to talk like lovers do
I want to dive into your ocean
Is it raining with you

So baby talk to me
Like lovers do
Walk with me
Like lovers do
Talk to me
Like lovers do

Here comes the rain again
Raining in my head like a tragedy
Tearing me apart like a new
emotion
Oooooh
I want to breathe in the open wind
I want to kiss like lovers do
I want to dive into your ocean
Is it raining with you

So baby talk to me
Like lovers do

Here comes the rain again
Falling on my head like a memory
Falling on my head like a new
emotion
(Here it comes again, here it comes
again)
I want to walk in the open wind
I want to talk like lovers do
I want dive into your ocean
Is it raining with you

It's been awhile...

A watched pot never boils....

Nor does a timed uterus contract.

Yes, Crystal, I really did come up with that on my own.

Help Me Out Here!

Are you a member or friend of the Carnahan family?

Well, I'm in the process of creating our family & friends website. So far I have a photo gallery, (2 years in the making! Almost all of my Grandma's photos and some of my own along with others compiled along the way from other relatives.) a blog, (for us to all contribute our own memories and stories) & a message board (catch up with each other, recipe swap, etc.). Eventually I would like to add video and MP3 (not just of family events, but also Grandpa's preaching and Grandma's piano. Don't get too excited though, this last part may take some time.)



I still have quite a bit more work to do on this before it can be unveiled. I also have quite a few people to track down for updated photos, but may wait to do this after I am finished. There are also still some photos in my Grandma's storage so even when it is "done", it won't be complete. Considering I have a family and home, I am not always able to dedicate the time needed to this project, but I promise I am doing the best I can.



So, all that being said... Are you a Carnahan, Colson, Morris, or Troxel? Maybe a descendant, attended one of Bro. Carnahan's churches, or just a family friend? Do you have any suggestions? Know someone who might be interested in viewing and being a part of this project? Let me know, and I'll add your email to a list to keep you updated and let you know how to be a part!

Feel Like Laughing? Crying? Throwing Something? Cleaning Your Entire House Top To Bottom?

I hereby declare this pregnancy hormone awareness day!!! (Go through the videos in order for full effect...)

First, the song Bobby sang to me the night we got married. I know, awww... It just happened to be playing in the limo, and being nervous he sang along. This song always just makes me smile.




Now, to make you sad: You have to watch them in the exact order... Better yet, look them up for better quality versions...







Stop what you're doing! Put down the knife! Do NOT slit your wrists! "But why?!" You ask? "WHY did we have to go from happy to sad in 1.2 seconds flat?" I'll tell you why... Because that's what it's like! Not fun, is it?

Now, cheer up and watch this:



Fun! YAY! Happy! Weird, creepy, silly, but HAPPY!

Everyone getting on your nerves?





Angry and ticked, huh? But at least you feel vindicated... Don't be mad at me! I could have used a lot of worse songs just to make you feel anger! Trust me!

OK, Ignore the weird graphics...



Naturally, you worry just what that baby will look like...



Then you remember, everything will be fine...



Besides, if you're having one of Bobby's kids at least, it's inevitable...





That was just strange, and you can't explain it. You don't feel bad, but not quite like yourself either...

But who cares, you're STARVING!!!!



Now you're feeling sleepy...



What just happened? Why is it every time you fall asleep you wake up more confused? Stupid pregnancy dreams...




WAKE UP! You're nesting! Time to CLEAN!



Your husband thinks you are most certainly and definitely CRAZY!



Would not be complete without this...



Who doesn't feel happy and complete after hearing "Hysteria"? Oh yeah, that's just me... anyways...

And now, for at least a few moments...



But, here you are, and it is well...



And now, you have officially experienced a full mood swing. Congratulations! Were you truly pregnant, you would feel this way CONSTANTLY... never ending... it's such a beautiful process, isn't it? That's why to your husband you dedicate this:

I'm A Blubbering Idiot: At The Very Most, To Say The Very Least...

Adventures in incubating...

Yesterday Tommy & I ran to the store, and on the way home I decided to listen to the radio. Well, first song to make me cry, naturally, was Darius Rucker's "It Won't Be Like This For Long". I have 3 children, and often long for those days I just couldn't wait to pass... like the first night home with each of them. There I was, bawling on the freeway, while Tommy "sang" along in his car seat behind me.



Well, here's where it gets even stupider... more stupid... whatever! (You don't even know how to SPELL! (What I apparently yelled at my sweet husband in my sleep last night...))

When Bobby and I had been married about 6 months or so, his first father's day as Jeff & Becca's step dad, he made a list of songs he wanted me to hear that either he just liked in general or reminded him of me while I made him a father's day dinner. One was a Brad Paisley song. Since then when I have heard it, I kind of think "awww". Well, yesterday a DIFFERENT Brad Paisley song played on the radio... and there I was, deliriously confused and sobbing at how lucky I am to have him and how far we've come in the last 2 years and 4 months... It wasn't until HOURS later that I realized IT WASN'T EVEN THE RIGHT SONG! Boy, did I feel stupid. I cried for NOTHING! He laughed at this when I told him, I was mad. Gotta love hormones....

So, tell me, which Brad Paisley song do you think was the right one, and which one the wrong?

Quick Mention...

REALLY liking this song... Bobby even mentioned the words "Not Bad" when I asked what he thought of it... ENJOY! Not just great lyrics, but I also enjoy every other aspect of the song!




I definitely plan on buying the album when it releases in May!

I've had some Jars Of Clay popping up on my iPod lately, and I forgot just how much I love them. One of my favorites: (Video quality isn't the best...)



Grace

God, I admit I haven't changed
Playing card houses still covering my landscape
I never expected You to stay
When I'm grabbing for these crumbs and cold loose change

I feel Your grace come running over every road
I love the way You're calling overflow
I feel Your grace come running over every road
You break the floodgates down and carry all

God, I admit that I've loved these chains
And crawling around this cage sometimes has its advantages
I know someday this could get old
And I'll need Your healing water to find my home

Another "old" song I've been listening to a lot lately that is rather spiritually emotional...




Okay, so since I listened to that last tear jerker and am now crying, I better go wash my face and finish preparing dinner...

Big Fat HYPOCRITE!

Yup, that's me, the hypocrite!

For quite some time I have made quite a bit of fun of the snuggie. The first time I saw the commercial I wet my pants (Literally. Not a shock for those of you that know me...) and have made fun of anyone Bobby or I knows that owns one.

This was no secret to my parents...

Friday night Bobby and couldn't figure out why they were calling us into one of the back rooms when they usually come out to us. Lo and behold, there they were, both wrapped in Snuggies. I thought I was going to die from the laughter, until Dean said that one of them was mine.

WHAT?!

OK, I'm not going to lie. My first thought was "It actually isn't a bad idea, as long as no one has to know." But then I got home and was so cozy and comfy I just had to share it with the world. My only complaint is that I'm so short I really can't get up and walk with it. That would be great!

So, yes, I'm a nerd. I look like I'm part of a cult or a Trekkie. But hey, at least I'm WARM!

Thank you Bobby...

For now this is stuck in my head... just as you wished...

A Blog From Crystal...

Lettuce in the Ketis is the only thing to have. You might think it tastes good if you eat it on tacos. Now if you it eat it by itself, it doesn't have the same effect.

Some people think that giving birth probably isn't that difficult... unless, of course, you're giving birth to a head of lettuce. Without the epidural, the ice burg is the worst. I have heard the best way to soothe lettuce from the Ketis is the rejuvenation (rejuvenation station, that is...) of the hemorrhoidal defactoral fecal position. If this doesn't work you may want to try a phosphorous ioxide to help reduce the stinging sensation. After all of this is accomplished, you can now burn your candles, eat your cookies, and wash it all down with that famous lettuce.

Thank you for your time and energy.

Best Regards,

Lettuce From The Ketis

(Aka: Crystal)

P.S. YAY! My first blog (though not on my own blog) as a NEW WOMAN!

This is all I have to say about that...

(This is the only decent video of this song I could find, sorry.)




Tall Tales Taste Like Sour Grapes - Fair To Midland

To much patience
No resistance
Within shouting distance you can hear a blind mans bluff
Dragging names through the mud instead of biting his tongue
The devils in the air and I'm spitting out prayers
While the rubber necks all get their fill

Tell me, tell me a story
Tell me not to worry
Or pick up the phone
So I'm turning, turning a deaf ear
So that I don’t hear him throwing stones

To much hog wash not enough hear say
always made the front page
He could use a fine tooth comb
to get a word from the wise
Would be a welcome surprise
Keep an ear to the ground so to drown out the sound
cause the dead air is what made me whole

Tell me, tell me a story
Tell me not to worry
Or pick up the phone
So I'm turning, turning a deaf ear
So that I don’t hear him throwing stones

These walls don’t talk
Even when somebody knocks
These walls don’t stand
For anyone else but themselves
These walls wont fall
Even when gravity's failing us all

Tell me, tell me a story
Tell me not to worry
Or pick up the phone
So I'm turning, turning a deaf ear
So that I don’t hear him throwing stones

At Least It Wasn't Chicken Poop!

OK, so first of all... we have to go back about 7 1/2 years to the beginning of this story in order for it all to make sense...

At the time a lot of those that attend our current church were attending the Fontana PCofG. I was living in Washington State at the time and was down visiting with my then husband and baby Jeff over Summer break from school. Naturally, having a new camcorder I felt the need to record everything about my trip. If you know Crystal, then you know that she was naturally on quite a bit of the footage. Her and I felt the need to record EVERYTHING! Of course this also meant recording her after she fell walking to the car after morning service... into MUD. She did so gracefully, but then had mud all over her, and her reaction was hilarious while everyone just laughed... especially me. Kathy yelled out a valid point to Crystal, "At least it wasn't chicken poop!". I don't know why, but later that night when we watch the video from that day it cracked us up. This may not be too shocking, but I wet my pants. The combination of Crystal's face and Kathy's phrase was just hilarious. The term quickly became a daily part of conversation.

A few years later, a company released a lip balm. The name? "Chicken Poop". Kathy bought Crystal and I both a tube. Various pictures, emails, endearments have been traded between the 3 of us over these last few years. It's our "thing".

So, now to the present day. A few weeks ago at our mini ladies retreat at church Kathy, my Mom, and I were admiring these little chickens that were up for bidding in a silent auction to buy gifts for orphans. Kathy kept trying to tell me that I should want them because she wanted to buy them for someone. My Mom pointed out they would look cute in my kitchen... Kathy said I needed chickens since I blog about cooking them so much... and within a few minutes I decided "They must be mine!" and put down a bid. The next morning I was sick and unable to attend service. This last Sunday, Tommy was teething so badly that he barely slept (and barely let Bobby and I sleep) for the last 5 days. I had no idea where I stood in the bidding and figured I lost. I wasn't too bummed, but I was kind of sad and hoped to find some others later. Sunday night, my Mom calls on her way home from church to let me know KATHY BOUGHT ME THE CHICKENS! I was so excited. Bobby thought I was nuts.

Tuesday my Mom brought the chickens over and I placed them on the counter. I sent Kathy a picture text of them and she called to let me know "I was glad when they said unto me, let us put the chickens up on the counter". It was great. I was so happy and felt so privileged that Kathy did something so nice for me...

I cannot believe that with all of us involved (Crystal knew of the chicken bidding) NO ONE thought of "At least it wasn't chicken poop".

So, now, let me just say once again... Thank you Kathy for my chickens! At least they don't make chicken poop!

Ode to Kathy

I love Kathy, yes I do.
She is so cool,
and doesn't at all smell like poo...

Serial Killer Material

At one point in time I had this genius idea. Yes, it only happened once. I'm sorry to disappoint.

It started with a simple photo of my first child's newborn foot. It was one of my favorite photos for years, and still is. A few years later, I started taking photos of random feet. Ugly, pretty, big, small, shoes, boots, bare, etc. My thought was that I was going to create a coffee table book titled "Keep Your Feet On The Table" or something geeky like that. I don't remember. I even had friends and acquaintances sending me photos for the compilation. It was great.

Then my laptop crashed... and I lost the majority of my photos!

Naturally, over time, I lost interest.

But now... because of the title of this blog I have been inspired to do the same but with EYES!

Won't you? Won't you please? Let me put my camera up to your eye and flash my brilliant light into your life?

Seriously, everyone, feel free to send me photos of your eyes... or cropped photos only including the eyes. I'm weird, creepy, and might just be a freak. Why should that stop you? Try to make it artistic... If it goes well enough maybe I'll get back to my original idea about feet. You never know!